Resources for being adopted
Here you will find articles made up of personal stories, practical advice and reviews of published material. I created this resource in the hope it would help adopted people in search of answers and a feeling of belonging. Please get in touch if you are adopted and need any further support.
Rejection #2 (1990)
Playing the detective satisfies on so many levels. It’s a puzzle to solve, it’s a secret to bear, it’s an adventure to have, it’s a mother to find. I‘m not going to bother looking for my dad. I’ve decided he is a peripheral figure, a sperm donor if you like. It’s my biological mother I’m hunting and nothing is going to stop me! Except of course, me, I need to play it cool, not appear to needy. “I’m doing this for her” I say it so many times I have convinced myself. So I start, then stop, then re-start, then pause; pendulating between search and avoid, like a child moving their hand towards a fire.
Journey Of The Adopted Self
This book, written by Betty Jean Lifton in 1994, focuses on three stages of the journey that adopted people take in “a quest for wholeness” – the subtitle of the book. It’s an unapologetically American study of the authors own experience of being adopted, along with a large amount of research. Despite its age and non-UK feel I would say it is well worth a read, mostly because what Lifton describes really resonated personally with my own journey.